Don't Drop The Pretty Women! (or the wheelsucker!)

Several ABRT riders who occasionally have trouble holding the group pace on a fast ride have come up with tactics to slow the ride down. Alex Pline used to feel vulnerable on a somewhat long climb like where the Saturday ride goes past the horse farm, shortly before the wall. He would ease his way up to the front and set a pace that he could manage, trying to get everyone to follow him rather than come around him. A senior ABRTer is well known for calling for a pee break just before another long shallow climb on the Saturday ride, slowing the group pace (though in fairness to him, the wheelsucker and several other riders usually take advantage of the opportunity). The wheelsucker is reluctant to admit to others (or himself) that he is having trouble hanging with the big dogs, so is working on a slightly different approach. He shouts out, "Don't drop the pretty women!", trying to convince the leaders of the group that they need to slow down or risk dropping some of the female riders. In most cases the pretty women are doing just fine thank you, and it is the wheelsucker who badly needs the leaders to slow down, but perhaps the riders driving the pace don't know this, or so hopes the wheelsucker.

This has worked for the wheelsucker several times recently. The most recent being the Monday (Martin Luther King Day) ride where the group did the Saturday ride route backwards.

The strong riders trying to drive the pace were Ace, Stu, Denzel and Tom Aga; there were several mid level riders some of whom could have stayed on if they were careful. There was also a strong female rider, Christine, who was new to group rides.

Once across route 2 onto the rollers (the same rollers were attacks sometimes succeed on the Saturday ride, but going the other way), Ace and the boys started ramping it up. The wheelsucker was game for the first few and carefully wheelsucked to stay with the lead group, and had even "showed off" a little earlier by going off the front a couple of times. But the wheelsucker quickly decided that doing 60 miles at the pace Ace, Stu, Tom and Denzel seemed to want to go, was not going to be fun. And it may not even have been possible for an aging, out-of-shape, in-off-season-form, sore-from-Saturday wheelsucker (the wheelsucker has run out of excuses here, but promises to work on that and come back and edit this posting to add any additional good ones he can come up with) to hang with the big dogs. So the wheelsucker looked around and noticed that Michelle, her boyfriend, and their friend Christine were slightly OTB, and immediately used the "Don’t drop the pretty women" ploy. It worked several times, and the wheelsucker dropped back to check on the others and help tow tail enders back up to the group. But the group split for good doing the wall backwards, and the wheelsucker decided he was going to have a nicer ride if he hung back with the slower group (and refuses to even discuss the possibility that he could not have stayed with the leaders if he had wanted to).

Now Michelle and her boyfriend are more than strong enough to stay with the main group and chase down a few attacks (Michelle does all of Tuesday/Thursday and Saturday rides), but they were not going to drop Christine in south county by herself, so they took it easy. And the wheelsucker, Alex Pline and Dave from Bike Doctor Annapolis joined them, with Alex and the wheelsucker trying to take steady pulls that kept the group together, at a good pace. Christine was not comfortable wheelsucking, and was hanging way back, so was doing more work than she needed to.

The two groups rejoined at the rest stop, but quickly split again. Alex tried to bridge up to the lead pack, and came within a few bike lengths but couldn’t make it. He came back to the leisurely ride group. The wheelsucker had decided that not dropping the pretty women could be a mantra, and did not even try to go with the big dogs.

It was actually a very nice ride, thought the wheelsucker. A steady sub 20mph pace in the late afternoon, with the sun setting and long shadows of cyclists in a paceline off to one side or the other. Christine did the third longest ride in her life and was still going strong when she, Michelle and Michelle’s boyfriend turned off to go home, shortly before 214.

That left Alex Pline, Dave from Bike Doctor Annapolis, and the wheelsucker as the chase group. The wheelsucker decided he might just be the strongest of the three, as it was Dave’s first long ride of the season, and Alex was tired from his bridge attempt. So the wheelsucker upped the pace to test his theory, only to be attacked by Alex on a short climb. The wheelsucker and Dave chased down Alex, the wheelsucker caught his breath, and then got back on the front driving the pace, hoping Alex and Dave would tire before he did. Shortly before the finish Dave sat up, but the wheelsucker was unable to shake Alex. So the sneaky wheelsucker went to plan B, and sucked Alex’s wheel. Alex slowed down to an easy pace to recover and then slowed down to a very slow pace [Alex:to see if the Wheelsucker would take the lead, which was silly because he is, well, the Wheelsucker], and the wheelsucker waited, and waited, and waited. And then, going down the last dip before the uphill sprint, the wheelsucker BRAKED to open a gap, waited some more and then jumped Alex HARD! Well, as hard as an aging, out-of-shape, in-off-season-form, sore-from-Saturday wheelsucker can jump a knackered-from-extended-bridge-attempt rider. The wheelsucker stood up, sprinted to close the gap, and sheered to the left at the last moment, going by Alex just after the bottom of the dip in what looked like a full on serious sprint. AND IT WORKED!!!!!!! Alex looked over and decided not to contest the sprint. The wheelsucker kept going, standing, opening up a big gap on Alex, who was soft pedaling [Alex: I had only one effort left, the aforementioned attack], and then tiring and feeling a little foolish, the Wheelsucker soft pedaled for the line.